on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I accidentally burped into my bong.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
She swung at the pinata with crutches
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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