People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
