remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize
