so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Dear god my vagina.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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