Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
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