I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I need to align my fucking chakras
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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