You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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