Well douche your snatch and let's go!
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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