yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
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