Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
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