How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
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