He told me they were just razor bumps!
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize