On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
It's official drugs can't kill me
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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