Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Come on in and take your pants off
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