That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
