it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
