Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize