Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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