I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
