Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(847): View more from Illinois

i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind

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(989): View more from Michigan

I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.

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(512): View more from Texas

Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time

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(303): View more from Colorado

It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.

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Read it at the TFLN blog
(760): View more from California

my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night

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(515): View more from Iowa

nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.

(215): View more from Pennsylvania

did she buy you pizza?

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(605): View more from South Dakota

No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.

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(440): View more from Ohio

He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.

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