Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
25 Of The Most Common Life Mistakes Young People Make
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
25 People Confess What They Really Think When They See An Obese Person
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate