I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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