Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
