Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize