She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I'm at about main and main street
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
