I got chris browned last night
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize