If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
