she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
no you cant smoke seaweed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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