I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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