eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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