Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
