spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Randomize
