oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Randomize
