yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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