hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Dicks are not precious.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Randomize
