I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
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