Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
