first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
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