they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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