Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
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