If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
found the other keg... it's in the tree
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
