I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
19 People Did The Wildest Things When They Were Black-Out Drunk
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
21 Signs That A Dude is Probably Insane
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit