Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

yo i have your phone

(202): View more from Washington, DC

... oh so you probably won't get this message

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(816): View more from Missouri

Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie

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(775): View more from Nevada

god, a vagina is an amazing trump card

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(802): View more from Vermont

you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin

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25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
Read it at the TFLN blog
(818): View more from California

I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.

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(707): View more from California

I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.

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(206): View more from Washington

Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.

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(805): View more from California

i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person

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