what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
there is glitter all over my balls
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