Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
