I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
