you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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