We're like a lot better than the average bears
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
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