Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this hospital has no fireball
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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