between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
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