I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
