So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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