Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
